How can we not be angry?

 

    Why are we angry? Usually we will be angry when we experience a situation that is different from our expectations; there is also: when we are violated, whether it is physical, verbal or mental violations, it will also make us angry . From the perspective of Buddhism, the root cause of anger is the attachment of self —— want to protect self or keep self in a happy state; more deeply, it is to hate things that make ourselves unhappy; this kind of thought seems to be nothing wrong, but when this kind of thought becomes very strong, it often makes us do things that are contrary to normal acts.

    What are the disadvantages of being angry? When we are angry, we can't think well, sometimes we lose our minds and commit acts that break the law or hurt others. According to modern medical research, the body secretes certain hormones when we are angry, which can cause damage to our health in the long run. And it's not just our personal problem. Anger can cause estrangement and distrust between people, and let others avoid meeting us. In addition, anger will damage our merit, make our hearts unable to calm down, and our lives will be negatively affected.

    How can we not be angry? Because not everyone can immediately let go the attachment of self and avoid hating things that cause himself unhappy, so Buddhism provide some temporary method of treatment:

． Mindfulness

    Mindfulness is to be aware of that oneself is about to be angry or is getting angry, and take action to let oneself leave the scene or calm down the mood. Realizing that we are in a state of anger is the most basic condition for not being angry; as for what actions to take and how to calm our mind, there are several other ways.

． Observing our own breathing.

    When we are angry, usually the mind is already confused. Using the meditation method of observing our own breathing can make our mind be controlled by the reason again. Shift your attention from the annoying event to your own breathing, and perceive the sense that the air comes in and out below your nostrils; if your thought goes back again to the event that make you angry, tell yourself: "No other things are more Important than this, I want to observe my breathing and calm my mind.” And turning your attention to your breathing again. After pulling back and forth with the annoying event several times like above, the mind will gradually settle on the breath, and the irritating event will gradually become less annoying as it was at the beginning. At this time, the anger has been basically controlled. .

． Contemplating compassion

    When we have perceived our own anger, we may immediately turn our attention to an already set imagination —— the person who makes us angry is our parents, brothers and sisters, relatives or the person who makes us angry is being affected by great pain and he needs our sympathy. Constantly shift thoughts to these imaginations. Because compassion and anger are just two opposite thoughts, they will not appear at the same time. When our imagination is deep enough, the anger can be subdued; this method needs to be practiced in ordinary times. The more familiar we are with this kind of imagination, the easier we can control our anger.

． emptiness and non-self

    As mentioned earlier, the root of anger is the attachment of "self", so as long as the attachment of self can be reduced, anger can be reduced, or the degree of anger can be reduced. This method also needs to be practiced at ordinary times. First, after realizing that you are angry, start telling yourself: "Self" is just an illusion, and it does not really exist; all things are also illusions, and they do not really exist. And since everything is an illusion, there is no need to hate things that make us angry. After thinking this way for a few times, the mind will slowly calm down. If we can reduce the degree of our dislike for things, the degree of anger can be reduced.

    Although these imaginations are imaginary, we are not deceiving ourselves. The Buddha once said: From a long time ago to now, in countless reincarnations, all beings are once our parents and relatives. And the idea that "self" does not exist and that everything does not exist are the conclusions drawn by the enlightened person who observes the truth of everything in meditation. Therefore, these imaginations are all correct ideas. Regular practice is helpful for spiritual practice. Don't worry.

    "Anger" is harmful to the individual and society, and there is no any benefit. If all people learn to control their anger, it will be beneficial to the individual and society without any harm.